Clinique Beyond Perfecting 2-in-1 Foundation Review

As an acne prone gal, I always go for full coverage foundations but I hate a heavy foundation, so the search for a perfect foundation for my skin type is quite tricky.

I used to use Estee Lauder DoubleWear Foundation, but it seemed to dry out my skin and set like a clay mask - not cool. So I went on the hunt for another high end foundation replacement (cheap foundations break me out). Clinique were the ONLY counter in John Lewis to offer a tester for foundations. The other brands such as Urban Decay, Charlotte Tilbury etc just expected you to buy the foundation and deal with it. I knew I was never going to just buy a foundation without trying it because I know how sensitive my skin is. Imagine buying a £40 product only to find out that it breaks you out or gives you a rash? NO THANK YOU.

Beyond Perfecting foundation is advertised as a 2 in 1 foundation and concealer, they say you only need to use the foundation to cover blemishes or an uneven skin tone. I have to say that this is true, the coverage is amazing, I only need to use a concealer under my eyes as I like a lighter shade to brighten up that area. Clinique were actually cheaper than all those other stuck up brands, so after I got (badly) colour matched, I went off with a couple of pots (different shades) to test at home. I got about a weeks worth of foundation out of each pot! I decided to buy the colour 15 - Beige, the one they had colour matched me to, but it had a weird tone to it and I ended up having to use a concealer with it to lighten the shade slightly. Recently I found that the colour 10 Honey Wheat is more my tone (slightly orange, but much better than the beige).

Clinique Beyond Perfecting Pros and Cons

PROS:

* Amazing full coverage

* Doesn't feel heavy on the skin

*A little bit of product goes a long way

* Doesn't break me out

CONS:

* Yet to find the perfect shade (are all the colours slightly dodgy? who knows)

* The colour matching service is not great

*The foundation is difficult to set (I use MAC Prep & Prime Powder to set) , it will come off on your pillow or on somebody's T-shirt when you hug them very easily

* Is not cruelty free

See my YouTube video for a coverage reference, I show my acne scars and then I apply the foundation so you can see the difference:

Stop Seeking Acceptance From People Who Are Committed to Not Accepting You

Anyone who has ever experienced peer pressure, usually at school, will probably know what it's like to not feel accepted. Unfortunately this feeling can follow you through to adulthood. The problem isn't with you or how you are as a person, it's because you've let yourself be defined by how other people treat you. I personally struggled with feeling accepted throughout school. Girls are the worst, they can decide to not like you for absolutely no reason. I constantly felt bad about myself because I wasn't getting invited to the parties my friends were going to and sometimes even my own friends would leave me out, like I had become an unpopular choice for absolutely no reason. Maintaining friendships through school was hell, absolute hell but it also taught me so much.

There comes a point, after about the 10th party or friend group gathering you're not invited to where you have to think - I don't care. It's emotionally exhausting to constantly fight for a friendship, to constantly act how you think they want you to act - Super friendly even when they've offended you, always starting the conversation first, inviting them out to places with you (which they're often too busy to go to anyway). You have to realise that these people are not your friends if they're making you feel rejected and left out. After years of desperately trying to fit in I thought 'OK, I can either carry on and feel heartbroken every time i'm left out of another gathering or party, or I can stop trying and see things for how they are.'  The moment I stopped trying to fit in, stopped texting them first, stopped inviting them to hang out with me I felt free. There was a point where I felt lonely and friendless, but I met new people who were on my wavelength, who taught me what a friendship should feel like - it shouldn't be hard work!

So when I now encounter people with the same attitude as the mean girls at school, I put on my emotional coats of armour. I'm polite, I'm friendly but I don't force a friendship. My friends are on my wave length, my friends message me first as much as I message them, my friends suggest meeting up instead of me always asking. That's what a healthy friendship is. Unfortunately I still see people trapped in this vicious cycle of needing to be accepted by toxic people. It's so not worth it! You are a lovable person, and you do not deserve to feel rejected. Focus on the people who make you feel good about yourself, who remind you of all your good traits and leave the others behind. Be mature, be friendly, be polite, but keep those toxic 'friends' at arms length. For the sake of your own happiness.

I found the following article very empowering, so if you are struggling with a toxic friendship take a read of this: The Huffington Post

Also check out my YouTube video where I talk about my struggles during school which lasted from about age 13- 18!

Close both eyes, to see with the other one.

I never thought I'd be writing a post like this. Because there was a time when believing in the paranormal got you labelled as a crazy person. People do not like what they can not explain so they joke about it and dismiss the idea. But so many people have experienced the paranormal, so much so that the whole idea is accepted these days. I definitely have witnessed a spiritual shift in the past few years. People are openly talking about visiting mediums like it's as normal as getting your nails done. Meditation is also now incredibly normal and encouraged where as a few years ago, people mocked the idea. 

I have grown up believing in the afterlife and believing in ghosts. Mainly because I was brought up in a spiritualist family. It's not a separate religion, it's just a different version of Christianity I suppose. A lot of mediums class themselves as Spiritualist Christians. I personally describe myself as a little bit Atheist and a little bit Christian but definitely a spiritualist. I believe in a heaven and an afterlife but I do not believe in the stories of Jesus or the bible. I believe that when we die we go to a place of peace, where we get to see our loved ones again. Where only our souls exist. I also believe in re-incarnation as do a lot of spiritualists. They say we experiences multiple lives to learn different lessons and if we fail to learn, we repeat a similar life again. There are actually a lot of documentaries on proof that re-incarnation exists, the whole idea fascinates me and it's something I've explored personally too. But i'm going to save that subject for a separate blog post and video. I just wanted to give you a brief explanation of my beliefs.

So growing up I would randomly see people standing around me for a flicker of a second. Sometimes it would be someone in the hallway, another time it was somebody watching me play with my dog in the garden. I would see them out of the corner of my eye, go to look at them but they wouldn't be there. But what was weird, was that I could describe their appearance and the expression on their face in so much detail. From their hair colour to the items of clothing they were wearing. One particular spirit, the one who was watching me play with my dog, I believe was my great grandfather. He was wearing clothing from the 1940s/50s and when I described his appearance to my mum, she said it sounded like her Grandfather. I never felt scared when I saw these random people. I instinctively knew they weren't evil, more like passers by who were not used to being seen. Later I developed the ability to hear ghosts. I was a teenager by this point. I begun hearing voices which sounded like two or more people having a conversation but I couldn't hear what they were saying, they were quiet and muffled, like i'd tuned into a radio station with a poor signal. But later I went on to hear voices which I mistook to be real (physical) people. Not by choice, none of my experiences were through deliberately trying to connect. 

Usually if you are open to experiencing the paranormal, you often have a very good sense of intuition. I have always had an uncanny way of predicting the future. Sadly in a negative way, I can always sense when something is going to go wrong or if something is already wrong. So many times I've asked people to double check their plans because I've had a feeling that something had changed and I would always turn out to be right. I believe that my intuition is often spiritual, like somebody is telling me what's really going on. I've even caught out liars because I've been told what to say to them to get them to crack. It's absolutely insane, I love it. It feels like I always have somebody looking out for me. I do try to deliberately connect with loved ones, or my spirit guide but I've never been able to get to that level mediums achieve. I just get the odd message or a sign through meditation and dreams. 

I have storytime videos up on my Youtube channel which explains my most surreal paranormal experiences. So take a look and feel free to get in touch. Have you experienced similar things to me? What are your beliefs?

>See my paranormal playlist here<

My balayage journey *Que dramatic music*

Let's talk balayage! NOT dip dye or even Ombre! In my many years of trying to achieve the perfect balayage (7 years to be exact) I have come to realise that Balayage, Ombre and Dip dye all mean different things to different hairdressers.

I have always wanted that sun kissed, beachy look by turning my naturally black hair blonde, in a natural looking way. It sounds impossible but it's not. So many girls on Instagram have the exact look i'm after, and 9/10 of them are asian or naturally have black hair. Balayage is an art, especially when you can make naturally black hair look sun kissed blonde. Unfortunately all of these girls I draw inspiration from are either in America or Austrailia - the countries I soon discovered, are where the balayage gods reside.

Here in the UK if you ask for a balyage like this:

You get this:

Both styles are lovely don't get me wrong! But I can not express to people enough what a difference those tiny pieces of highlighted hair which fade up to the root make! Hair which is only dyed at the bottom will always look like a colour that's growing out, it will always look like a dip dye. Some people want that look but when I ask for a balayage, I want that sun kissed highlighted natural graduation! Not an ombre or a dip dye, but unfortunately I find that the UK hair scene is so behind on the whole balayage trend. I don't know why! it frustrates the hell out of me.

But alas, I am writing this review to tell you all about the little gem of a hairdresser I discovered in Essex. Daisy - the balayage sorceress with techniques to match the hair gods of Australia & America. Daisy owns a hair salon in the Southend/ Leigh on Sea area which is called Balayage Boutique! - the name says it all. I have had daisy dye my hair a few times and every time she listens to my hair dreams and she tells me what's realistic. I described the exact situation I have just explained and she immediately knew what I meant and what I wanted. I was beginning to think that balayage was a really difficult process which would cost hundreds because I just couldn't find a hairdresser who would give me those blended highlights & an Ombre AKA Balayage. But Daisy made it sound super easy, she just said 'Oh yeah I know what you mean, you want free hand highlights and an Ombre' I blinked in suprise, she made it sound so easy! YES Daisy that is exactly what I want!

My dreams of looking like a Californian beach babe were back on! Daisy was super reasonable in price and cost me a fraction of what local salons were charging for a 'balayage'. We bleached and toned my hair around 3 times, in the space of 6 months. Because I had dyed my hair back to black so many times, the colour was stubborn. But here are my results (excuse my messy hair - it knots within seconds which is why I've always thought the beach babe look would suit me haha) :

& here's a neater photo, my hair was cut and styled by my other favourite hairdresser @mobile_hairgf

I didn't want a clear line of thats your natural colour and that's bleach on the ends! I also didn't want a  'oh i see you've tried ombre'ing your hair but have just bleached your entire head except for the very roots' look. Sorry if i'm sounding like a sassy bitch but this hair rant has been a long time coming (7 years *echos out*). Daisy did a fabulous job of making sure my hair had the perfect blend of bleach and natural colour. I love how there are still dark bits poking through, it definitely creates a sun kissed illusion by making it seem only the parts the sun would touch are lightened. Thanks to Daisy i'm one step closer to being this girl:

I just need the beach and care free mind to follow :)

Follow Daisy on Instagram: @hairbalayard
She also runs a balayage school for hairdressers looking to master the technique
https://www.balayageschool.co.uk/

Her salon is based in Southend/ Leigh - Essex and specialises in freehand colouring. A bonding hair treatment is included in all hair packages which helps strengthen and moisturise the hair which is really important after you bleach the hair - especially for us brunettes. I can not recommend her enough. So if you're looking to transform your look - check her out!

Thank you for reading, and I hope I haven't offended too many of you. Until next time..... rant over.

- Robyn x

Feeling Down?

It's impossible to be happy all day everyday. When you look on social media and see how perfect other peoples lives look with captions like 'I love my life' or 'I'm so happy' it's easy to think wow, I wish I loved my life as much as they do theirs. But it's not real! Of course they have down days too!

I'm learning to fake it until I make it in life, and that includes being happy. When I hate how I look or feel fat, I put make up on and clothes which compliment my body. I pretend I feel fabulous, I put on my sasha fierce alter ego and honestly it's the best feeling in the world. Sometimes I think, hey why I don't I make this much effort all the time? I feel so much better when I put time into my appearance. That's the first thing. But it doesn't help the anxious butterflies I get in my tummy, or the sadness I feel I can't escape from. 

That's when I find a focus. My focus is my business, Photography & all things social media. I take some selfies for my blogging instagram, I think of new video ideas, I listen to inspiring music and I lose myself in Photoshop! My business is my hobby as well as my income. If you work a 9-5, find a hobby! I can not stress this enough, finding something which takes you away from the world and your everyday troubles is the best therapy. Do something positive which helps you or other people? Volunteer? Go for more walks? Take up photography by using your phone? Find something which opens your mind and gives you purpose.

As long as you feel you have a purpose, nothing or nobody can destroy you. Nobody can leave you feeling helpless. Find your own source of happiness, do not rely on other people to fulfil your life because this leaves you vulnerable (I still struggle with this!)

When you're at your lowest and you feel lost or depressed, you only have yourself. You have to pick yourself up and give your life meaning.

I always feel inspired to write these 'life talk' posts when I feel down or upset because it's like giving myself a pep talk! It reminds me that i'm not as weak as I feel. I have a purpose and the means to make myself happy and so do you.

Make Up Monday: Beauty and The Beast, Belle's Make-up look

Seen as the new Beauty and the Beast is around the corner, I thought I would talk about Belle's make up and recommend a couple of products for creating this look.

Belle, although french in the original Disney movie, has the look of an English Rose. An English rose, to me, appears natural but rosey and glowing! Here's a run down on how to achieve an English Rose make up look:

1. Use a light base -  A BB cream or a light foundation (I recommend No7)

2. Conceal under the eyes with a concealer lighter than your skin tone (I recommend Mabelline Age Rewind Concealer)

3. For the eyes, use a beige or brown close to your skin tone on the eyelid and a darker brown to cut your crease. Use a pencil liner as you don't want anything too striking or bold and line your top lash line lightly. Use a lengthening mascara and corner lashes for a Disney Princess effect. Keep your lower lash line bare as this creates a wide eyed effect. Or if you feel you need the balance, apply a soft brown shadow on the bottom lash line with a brush of mascara.

4. Lightly contour the cheeks and tap a bit of pink blusher on the apples of the cheeks. ( I recommend NYX, darker skin tones go for a peachy tone, lighter skin tones go for a light pink)

5. Use a highlighter to highlight your cheekbones! (I recommend MAC Soft and Gentle)

6. The brows need to remain natural looking and bushy for an innocent look. Use a powder slightly lighter than your natural brow colour (if your brows are black or dark brown) and fill in the gaps without drawing a completely new shape. ( I recommend Barry M's Eyebrow kit)

7. And of course, apply red lip stick to the lips. (I recommend Gerard cosmetics)

Although my skin tone is darker than your average English Rose, I tend to use this make up look a lot as it's a neutral pretty look.

My favourite products for creating this look on me are: 

- Gerard Cosmetics - Red Lipstick in Fire Engine

- NYX Showgirl Eyeshadow, which is a warm orange colour so it's good to blend this with your browns if they appear too dark.

Thanks for reading! As always, let me know if you have any questions!

If you would like to see a make-up tutorial, have a look at my video below :)

Read this if you think Valentines Day is a con

I can not stand it when people turn their nose up at valentines day. What is there to hate about the day? No one is forcing you to book an over priced meal or buy elaborate gifts. The day is not about spending out on material things, it's about romance. The world is full of so much evil and darkness, why ignore a day which promotes spreading love?

'Romance: a quality or feeling of mystery, excitement, and remoteness from everyday life.' - Dictionary

I am such a romantic. Even when I was single and had pretty much accepted that I would live out the rest of my days as a spinster, I still thought the idea of valentines day was lovely. I loved seeing old fashioned romance advertised and promoted across the world. I loved that people put the extra effort in to make their partner feel special and appreciated. I know they say every day should feel like valentines day in a relationship, but unfortunately it's unrealistic to be romantic 24/7. Life gets in the way! There are a list of priorities that come before a candle lit dinner. So valentines day acts as a designated day where you as a couple both put the effort in to being loving, generous and thoughtful. It's a day where you both click pause on the world and focus on each other.

I do think women care about romance more than men. It comes from a part of us that remains innocent and vulnerable. We want to experience the love our childhood princess's felt in the videos we used to watch. We want to feel special, loved and appreciated. There is something so heart warming about seeing a man doing something incredibly thoughtful for the woman he loves. It shows a vulnerability. He wants to please the woman he loves, and he has taken the time and effort to think of a way that would touch her heart, and that to me, means the world.

'Romance is the glamour which turns the dust of every day life in to a golden haze'

A romantic gesture does not have to be extravagant or expensive. Pick your girlfriend up her favourite sweets to put a smile on her face? Or some pretty flowers (or even a plant!)? Make her something if you are an artist or DIY savvy? Make her dinner and pamper her for an evening? It's not about the 100 red roses or a designer bag, I mean that's lovely if you can afford it but it's the little things that count. Often it's more about the heart felt words hand written in a card or the touching photo collage of your relationship so far that mean everything to a partner. But with all that said, why shouldn't girls do something for their boyfriend too? A lot of boyfriends look after their girlfriends every day. They buy the dinners, they treat them to the cinema. Perhaps it's the girlfriends time to show their appreciation? Valentines is about showing that you both love and appreciate one another.
So follow your hearts and enjoy a day full of love and happiness  xxx

Make up Monday: Look tanned in the Winter!

Most of us want that bronze 'just been on holiday' glow, but anyone who lives in the UK will know the struggle. Our summer is so unreliable, it's pretty hard to get a chance to sun bathe!
Some of you may be thinking, 'hey, aren't you naturally tanned?' I am mixed race after all! But my skin tone in the Winter is quite wishy washy. Without my much needed vitamin D, my skin turns green... yes green. I can only think it's because medium skin tones often have yellow undertones, so in the winter I do actually resemble an olive.
I always thought self tanner was only for pale skin tones. I'd feel silly putting fake tan on so I never did. Instead I just flaunted my green legs while my friends looked lovely and bronze.
But that all changed when my mum came home with a body lotion with self tanner in it. I'd always known about these, but once again I just assumed brown/ green people couldn't use products designed for paler skin tones. My mum raved about this tanning body cream and told me to give it a go, so with nothing to lose,  I did. The moisturiser gave me a subtle bronze glow after a few days of use which made me look like i'd been out in the sun. I looked like a healthy brown girl again! Goodbye olive legs!

I went out and bought my own self tanning moisturiser and discovered that Dove had designed the lotion for different skin tones (fair to medium & medium to dark skin), my mum had got the fair - medium version, so I decided to pick up the medium-dark. The darker version worked better with my skin tone, giving me a deeper tan. Because it is a slower way of tanning (it takes a few days to see any difference), there are no streaks! and the colour is build-able. By slowly building up your tan, you skip the whole 'oh crap, i'm orange' stage, because you can slowly see how the tan is working with your skin tone so you can stop at any point.

If you're scared about buying a self tanner that develops overnight and you're against sun beds (like I am), try using 'Dove Derma Spa Summer Revived' It's sold almost everywhere (Boots, Tesco etc) and is currently on offer at Tesco! (Was £5 now £3.50)

If you're not much of a reader, try watching my Youtube review!

-Robyn x

Theatrical Thursdays: Vikings

When my boyfriend told me to watch a TV show called 'Vikings' a couple of years ago, my initial reaction was 'oh, erm.. no thank you.' that era was boring to me. I've come to realise that history in general is boring to me unless it's told in a story like form. I watched the Tudors and The White Queen and suddenly found myself researching the royal line, connecting the dots and educating myself on the ruling history of the United Kingdom. The exact same thing happened when I watched the Vikings!

First of all it's shot in such an epic cinematic way and directed by the same man (Michael Hirst) who directed The Tudors! The soundtrack is by none other than Hollywood's best, Hans Zimmer (composer for Inception, Interstellar, Pirates of the Caribbean & more). They also use a band from Norway called Warduna who's music is based on Nordic Spiritulism, there's a lot of chant like singing and repetitive drums in their music which brings a tribal element to the scenes. So the budget must have been pretty big and it shows.
The show is supposed to be set in Norway but is actually filmed in Ireland. Thanks to the way the colours are edited, the setting is believable. It has a cold and eerie feel, just as you would expect rural Scandanavia to look.

Ragnar Lothbrook and Lagertha

Let's talk costumes! What comes to mind when you think of the vikings? Funny metal hats and big fur capes? (probably not the correct term). Well this show has vamped up the interpretation of a Viking. Although the shows costumes are 'historically incorrect', they look so much cooler! The Vikings are portrayed as savages, a little rough and caveman like next to the sophisticated (but weak) French and English people. They wear leather armour rather than chain mail and although they wear those fur capes, you can see they are wolf skin pelts sewn together which is sightly horrific but authentic. The styling is amazing. I just find the whole re-invention of the viking's portrayal fascinating! Both men and women wear their hair plaited in different forms. The men often shave the sides of their heads leaving only the top part of their hair long and in a plait (a bit like a horse's tail). They're big on tattoos too, they look tribal and dirty which makes them appear scary, and scary is what they were! They did invade the UK, killing thousands of innocent people after all.

The story line focuses on a real viking legend - Ragnar Lothbrook. The story of Ragnar was told by old norse poets so the story line isn't a modern creation. The old tale of Ragnar and his sons is brought to life in a sympathetic and personal way. Ragnar wants nothing more than to broaden his horizons. He wants to find more land, raid more countries and venture in to the unknown. The Vikings are pagan and their lives are dictated by their Gods. They rely on signs in the form of dreams and visions, they even have a strange oracle who relays messages to them directly from the Gods.
If they feel the Gods are on their side, they take chances without hesitation. They live their lives to please their Gods, so when they die, they enter their heaven (Valhalla) without fear. Religion plays a big role in the show, especially when they encounter the English who are devoutly Christian.

All in all the show is epic, original and educational. It really opens your mind up to exploring history. It's an underrated show which should be on par with Game of Thrones, so my advice to you is to check it out! You do have to get through a few episodes to get a feel for the show, but once you get past that initial barrier, you will become as obsessed as I am!

Find seasons 1-4 on Amazon TV!

- Robyn x

Fashion Fridays: Comfy is cool!

Love or hate the Kardashian/ Jenner crew, you have to admit they do look good! I'm particularly inspired my Kylie Jenner's fashion sense because she has nailed the whole 'curvy and I know it' look.

Curves are cool and I think the Kardashians and Kylie have played a big part in making curves a trend. Most of us girls now go to the gym not to slim down, but to build butts! We want that hourglass look because it's sexy and womanly but also empowering and strong! So if you're putting the effort in to buildings curves, you want to wear clothes that show off your hard work right? Now there's a fine line between looking confident and looking cheap but  90% of the time Kylie Jenner gets curvy fashion right. That's why I look to her for fashion inspiration, as well as her sisters Khloe and Kim Kardashian.

I thought the legging trend had died out, I used to have a whole draw full of leggings and long tops but to my dismay I threw them all out or used them for painting attire because they just weren't socially acceptable anymore but recently, Kylie Jenner seems to be wearing leggings ALOT.  Sometimes inappropriately (camel toe) but most of the time she pulls them off in a sport luxe kind of way. Now this is great for us, because leggings are stretchy, comfy and soft so they are perfect for day to day casual wear, especially on those days where you feel a little bloated and can't face doing up the button on your jeans.

To pull of 2016/17 style leggings you need to find a pair that are high waisted, and then pair them with a crop top. Crop top and leggings? fashion crime?! Not anymore! Gone are the days of wearing long tops to cover up your 'kind of see through' leggings. You need to find a thick pair so you are able to wear them like trousers. 

I went on a mission to fill my draw up with cool leggings and I achieved! High street stores have caught on to the sport luxe trend so places like New Look have stocked up on leggings and sporty attire in different varietys because we no longer just wear that stuff to workout. 

I found a thick pair of fleece lined, high waisted leggings and they are the comfiest things i have ever put on. I actually had to say 'these are delightful' to myself in the mirror when I tried them on in store (does anyone else do that?)

Because they were lined, they were thicker than usual leggings so they looked like trousers which meant I could get away with wearing shorter tops and not risk flashing my underwear or developing a camel toe (TMI)! They were so comfy I had to buy two pairs! They were around £10 each which is a bit pricey for leggings, but these are not normal leggings! 

I then went on a mission to find cool band T's that I could wear cropped or semi long because I LOVE that look! I'm so happy that the whole indie/rock chic look is back in fashion because once again, it's a comfy trend and I love the edgy twist. I found that most online boutiques stocked graphic/ band T's, but my favourite was from Lasula.co.uk.

Top: Lasula
Leggings: New Look

Don't get me wrong, I wouldn't wear this outfit to lunch, it's more of a lounge wear look which is acceptable to wear for errands too (well that's just my opinion).

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Thanks for reading :) x